Dine and Dash

At the end of dinner:
Maddie, age 4, "Can we leave now?"
Me: "No, we have to pay the check."
Maddie: "So... We don't just sneak out?"

Higher Ed

Eight-year old Caroline to 5-year old Maureen:
"Kindergarten doesn't really prepare you for first grade."

Who Are You?

Maureen to Patrick: I didn't know that was you. I thought it was someone who looks just like you.

So Weird!

Maureen to Patrick: My berfday is in February and I was BORN in February. That is SO weird!

Meet My Husband!

Maureen: Mom, look, this is my husband! [Proudly shows me a rectangular-shaped rock that fits in her hand.]

MaShell: Wow, really??

Maureen: Yeah. His name is Gravelin....I mean Rocklin because well, he likes to ROCK MAN!!

Later....Maureen was in the bathtub.

Caroline: Maureen, is that your husband IN THE BATH WITH YOU??? AND HE'S UNDER YOUR BOTTOM?? AND YOU TOOTED ON HIM??

The next morning, Maureen woke up crying. I sat on her bed to see what was wrong and when I sat down, put my hand onto the bed, right onto her husband. She had slept on the 2 in rock all night!

Will You Share That Recipe?

Maureen: Mom, when I get bigger, will you share that recipe with me?

MaShell: Yeah, sure. Why do you want it?

Maureen: Well, when I get bigger I wanna make banana bread for my kids cause it's so good.

MaShell: How many kids do you think you'll have?

Maureen: Oh, a brother and a sister and a big brother and a big sister and a little sister and a little brother.

MaShell: Wow, 6 kids!

Maureen: Yeah, and I will be SO old.

MaShell: Where will I be?

Maureen: Oh, you will be dead. I will be old and you will be dead. You will Mom, for real.

Remember the Huh???

Caroline was asking us about the Northeast and the Southwest and where they are.

Caroline: And in the Southwest, remember the alamino!

MaShell: The alamino?? What's that?

Caroline: The amalino??

Patrick: Oh my god, she means the Alamo!

Madeline: Elmo??

Caroline: Yeah! That's it, Remember the Alamo!