Saturday, October 3, 2009

Who Are You?

Maureen to Patrick: I didn't know that was you. I thought it was someone who looks just like you.

So Weird!

Maureen to Patrick: My berfday is in February and I was BORN in February. That is SO weird!

Monday, September 28, 2009

Meet My Husband!

Maureen: Mom, look, this is my husband! [Proudly shows me a rectangular-shaped rock that fits in her hand.]

MaShell: Wow, really??

Maureen: Yeah. His name is Gravelin....I mean Rocklin because well, he likes to ROCK MAN!!

Later....Maureen was in the bathtub.

Caroline: Maureen, is that your husband IN THE BATH WITH YOU??? AND HE'S UNDER YOUR BOTTOM?? AND YOU TOOTED ON HIM??

The next morning, Maureen woke up crying. I sat on her bed to see what was wrong and when I sat down, put my hand onto the bed, right onto her husband. She had slept on the 2 in rock all night!

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Will You Share That Recipe?

Maureen: Mom, when I get bigger, will you share that recipe with me?

MaShell: Yeah, sure. Why do you want it?

Maureen: Well, when I get bigger I wanna make banana bread for my kids cause it's so good.

MaShell: How many kids do you think you'll have?

Maureen: Oh, a brother and a sister and a big brother and a big sister and a little sister and a little brother.

MaShell: Wow, 6 kids!

Maureen: Yeah, and I will be SO old.

MaShell: Where will I be?

Maureen: Oh, you will be dead. I will be old and you will be dead. You will Mom, for real.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Remember the Huh???

Caroline was asking us about the Northeast and the Southwest and where they are.

Caroline: And in the Southwest, remember the alamino!

MaShell: The alamino?? What's that?

Caroline: The amalino??

Patrick: Oh my god, she means the Alamo!

Madeline: Elmo??

Caroline: Yeah! That's it, Remember the Alamo!

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Time Flies

Caroline: Mom, when are you going to take me to look at high schools and colleges? Because, you know time flies.

Birthday Drama

MaShell: Maureen, where are you going?

Maureen: I'm GOING to give out these birthday party invitations, I have to or else no one will come to my birt-day party. [Maureen's teacher said she spent all of her free time today writing out birthday invitations.]

MaShell: Your birthday isn't until February after Valentine's Day, so you have a few months to wait.

Maureen [dramatically putting on clip earrings]: Moooom. Well, when I am older I am simply not going to know you because you will die and I will not.

With that she held her head up high in the air and marched away.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Feng Shui

MaShell: Maureen, why don't you go see if the neighbor wants to play?

Maureen: Mom, that is just SO not feng shui.

First Day of School Advice

Caroline: Maureen, you really should stay away from the boys. They like to wrestle...they are rough...it's better to just stay away. Really.

Maureen: Okay, okay

Caroline: And there are only two computers so....you have to hurry.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

So Mean!

MaShell: Maddie, PLEASE go see your sisters. Go!

Dada: Go Madeline! Go to your room!

Madeline walking with head slunk down to hear room: Mean Momma! Mean Dada!

Madeline talking to her sisters: Momma Mean! Dada Mean! Mean Momma! Mean Dada!!

Sunday, June 14, 2009

Sidekick

Maureen: Mom, will you be my sidekick?

MaShell: Sure. What's a sidekick?

Maureen: I dunno, but I think I need one.

I Would Put That On My Web Site!!

We went to a party last night at a friend's house. There were probably 20 kids there under the age of 8. A baby pool filled with water was a little too tempting. A 4 year old boy immediately took off all his clothes and jumped in. All the kids gathered around and started chanting, "naked, naked." Another 3 year old girl took off her clothes super fast and jumped in.

The parents of the naked children came running down to the yard yelling their full names. All the other kids laughed and a few minutes later, began sharing everything they saw.

Caroline yelling to the whole group of kids: If I'd had a camera and a web site, I would have put that on my web site!

Family Meeting

Maureen (yelling throughout the house): Family meeting, family meeting!! On the porch. Family meeting.

On the porch with Maureen...

MaShell: So Maureen, why did you call a family meeting?

Maureen: Uh.....I don't know. Meetings are SO boring!!

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

BAD Baby!

When Madeline inevitably destroys a block castle built by her big sisters or colors all over their drawings, Caroline and Maureen have been calling her "bad baby." We tried to get them to stop but Madeline keeps repeating it to the point that it's become her mantra.

Madeline: Bad Baby Bad Baby Bad Baby

MaShell, just joking: Maddie, say, "Bad Da-da"

Madeline: Bad Momma

And busted!

Maureen Sleeps With Her Friends

Maureen outside playing with friends: Mom!! I'm going to sleep with my friends tonight! We're going to have a sleepover. It is going to be SO EXCITING!!!

MaShell: Maureen, what are you talking about? (thinking she's invited all the neighborhood children, who are all boys, over to spend the night)

All the neighborhood dads raising their eyebrows: Mmm...hmmm....

Maureen, gently lifting her hand filled with crawling roly-poly's up to me: My friends, here they are!! They are going to have a sleepover with me!!

Maureen, to her friends: C'mon guys!! Let's go to bed!!

And then she ran all the way home holding her hand high.

Nature Center Friends

Maureen at the Nature Center pointing at the eagles: Look mom, there's my friends. Bob and Lisa. Hi Bob. Hi Lisa.

Friday, April 10, 2009

When Madeline Draws on the Walls

Green crayon covering nearly every open wall space on the main floor.

MaShell using my mean Mom voice and pointing to the wall: Madeline, did you do this?

Madeline nodding and smiling: mmmmm

She then took me to the next wall to proudly show off her creation....

Madeline: Awwwww

I LIED!!

Maureen: I'm going to stay in here and talk to them.

MaShell: Talk to who? Daddy went downstairs.

Maureen: Talk to my imaginary brothers--Bobby, Tommy and Jack!!

2 minutes later...

Maureen (fake sniffling): Momma, I'm so sorry. I LIED!

MaShell: About what?

Maureen: Last week, the week before, the week before the week before that I lied (bursting into tears) about my imaginary brothers. They aren't real.

Poop Story #??

Maureen, looking into the toilet: It's a poop eh-stravaganza in the toilet!

Friday, April 3, 2009

Shopping With Maddie

Madeline LOVES the food section at Target. Boxes of cake mix and muffins were right at eye level. She grabbed a box of yellow cake mix with chocolate frosting and said, "MMMMMmmm....back?!" And tossed it into the cart. Then ran over and grabbed a cinnamon struesel muffin mix. Maureen wanted blueberry so there was some negotiating between them and they settled on blueberry. Again, Madeline was all big-eyed and full of " Mmmmmm....back, back, back" and then tossed it in the cart.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Miiiiiinnnne!

Madeline, every very day pretty much all day: Miiiinnnne! Mine ball! Mine ball! Miiiiinnnnne. Un-uh. Milk?

On Death and Dying...

Maureen: I miss that Grandma.

MaShell: I know, we all miss Grandma Helen.

Maureen: She's dead. And now she's in the ground.

I Need to Find Erin a House

Maureen with a very sad face: I miss Erin.

MaShell: I know, I do too.

Maureen: I have to find her a house. That way she can move back here and be my aunt again.

MaShell: She's still your aunt.

Maureen: No she's not. She moved. That's why I have to find her a house here.

Caroline was SO good!

Our nanny writes up a little summary of what happened during the day. Today, in Caroline's first grade handwriting Caroline wrote: Caroline was so good today. And the "so" was clearly a last minute squeezed in addition.

Mmmm

Maureen to PT: Dad, everything tastes better when it's dipped in something.

Sunday, March 1, 2009

Maureen's Jokes

Maureen: Why did the chicken cross the playground?? to get to the other SLIDE!!!

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Interrupting chicken
Interrupting chicken....BOCK!!!! BOCK!!!.......Who?

4 Already

Maureen has been telling everyone she sees her news: AND, I am 4 already!! AND I had a Strawberry shortcake cake and a princess cake and I am 4 now!! AND I got a haircut from Amy, she's in my dad's building.

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Book Club

Maureen: Caroline, Mom is having a party tonight for her book club.

Caroline: Wow, so everyone sits and reads their book? That's a lot of quiet for a party.

Lunch Request

Maureen/Lauren: Mom, today for lunch, I would like soouuu---ffffleee. What is souffle?

Friday, January 16, 2009

Miss DoLittle

While watching Dr. Dolittle...

Maureen: I can talk with animals.

MaShell: Oh really, but do they talk back?

Maureen: No. Yes, they talk in their animal language.

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

My Name is Lauren

MaShell: Maureen, let's go.

Maureen: Mom, my name is not Maureen. It's Luci.

MaShell: Okay Luci, let's go.

Maureen: Wait, wait, wait, that's not it. My name is Lauren. That's it. Lauren. I like 'L' names.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Maddie's First Fight!

Maddie (pulling on Maureen's pink socks): Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Maureen: What? What is she doing? Maddie STOP!!

Maddie: Myyyyyyy ocks!! Myyyyyyyy ocks!! (Translation: MY SOCKS!!)

I then ran upstairs, grabbed a pair of pink socks for Maddie and put them on her. She immediately stopped screaming and started smiling. She just wanted her pink socks!

I need a phone

Caroline: Mom, can I get a phone? I really need one.

Maureen: Me too.

Caroline: Maureen, you are not old enough.

MaShell: Why do you think you need a phone?

Caroline: Because the phones don't work at my school and what if you didn't give me my lunch or what about if it was a half-day and I needed to call you. What about that momma?

Monday, January 5, 2009

Rules for Adults According to Maureen

Maureen woke up this morning and immediately began declaring these Rules for Adults:

Number 1. Be polite
Number 2. Eat breakfast
Number 3. Get dressed
Number 4. Be polite again
Number 5. Be nice